Films, Music, Comics, Rants, Writings, Progress… The world of Paul R. Anderson

I’ve been a bit busy with work and other things. Amongst those other things has been my script. It’s nearing a finished 1st draft. The rough draft I sent out went over rather well. The people who read it liked it and some gave a lot of great feedback. Updates to the rough draft will be done soon. Once a working 1st draft of the script is finished  I’ll begin storyboarding a few scenes here and there. I’ve been talking with some people about helping to get this project going and it’s bound to be a very interesting process. Currently my biggest concern is sound. I want the sound of this picture to be as top notch as possible. This means that I will be looking out for a dedicated sound person to help get this done right. This also means I will be needing a bit more of a budget, as good sound is not a cheap thing. Unless you get a student who is studying sound and will work for cheap. Either way, it might be a rocky road.

On a side note, I’ve been wanting to do little comic strips for a long time now but I’ve never really had any funny ideas for them. Recently I… have gotten a few really fun ideas from my brother and my fiance’. As I start to play with these and get a cue of them done I’m thinking of throwing up a website to host them on. Here is the first I’ve created.

Idea by Kim Allan:

There are more of these to come as well as a few other random comic ideas that have been floated around.

Until then.

(…) Means I’ve been distracted by a customer

… Many a year ago I was a bit of an asshole. I would openly judge people, often times based on their appearance… This is something that most people do in their day to day lives. We all hear stories of people hiding their wealth to try and weed out undesirables. Often times we hear of those who don’t take any stake in their appearance but are some of the most enlightened and productively giving members of our society… But these gems of the human race are regularly judged by the masses who do nothing more than try to fit in.
I started thinking about what I was doing a couple years back and began analyzing myself. I didn’t like the fact that I had become so callous towards others. I would pass by beggers on the street and think they where complete scum and I would call people names in my head if they weren’t as pious as I. I’d formed this version of myself in my head that was neither humbled or nice. In reality my desire to be different from others on sheer principle was pigeonholing me as one of the crowd. Everybody claims to want to be different and most people believe that they are different. Even those people who actively go out of their way to act different are in fact not different. The idea is that these people are acting. They are putting on a mask, just like everyone else.
Thinking about all this depressed me a little. It depressed me because I’ve realized lately that being different isn’t a good thing for a lot of people. Some people can’t help being different and they get socially shunned because of it: people who have a retardation, physical deformities, missing body parts, etc. The reality is sad. These people want to be normal but will never be, while others wish to be different to stand out from the crowd.
It seems to me that if people want to be different these days they should educate themselves or learn to be more observant. And no matter how humble I might possibly become I will never be able to deal with stupidity. It annoys me greatly. I’m not a genius and I’ll never claim to be a genius. I’ll be the first the admit or openly state that. What I am on a regular basis is curious and observant. I try to take in my surroundings and get an overview of the situation before do anything. I pay attention to people and I read things. I also try not to assume things. I’ve been trying for quite sometime now to live under the principle that nobody is dumb. I do this because I’ve been surprised by people far too many time in the past to judge a book by its cover.
I’ve been working at Whiffies for a good while now and I’ve dealt with a myriad of different folk. On a regular basis I get cool people ordering pies, chatting with me and over all making this job enjoyable. But then, there are the others. I’m surprised that I haven’t begun grinding my teeth at the overwhelming number of people who do one of two things:
1. Customers walk straight up to the window (with tunnel vision it seems) and order an item that is not on the menu just to their left. They then get upset and disappointed that it’s not available. — I understand that we have certain items regularly that people know and love and will assume that we have. But even larger businesses run out of things from time to time, and Whiffies is not a large business.
2. Customers who walk up to the cart, look at the menu board (sometimes for a couple minutes, it seems) and then order a pie that’s not on the menu or ask if we have something that’s not on the menu. — This astounds me and I can’t help but judge these people. I don’t know why they do it. Perhaps they’re just being hopeful that the flavor that they want might magically appear if they ask for it, but other than that scenario I’m dumbfounded. The sad thing is is that this happens a lot. I chalk it up to blatant stupidity. When I tell them that their flavor, that clearly is not written on the board, isn’t in and they get confused and stare at me like a deer in head lights. I don’t know what to do or how to feel about this situation. I just know that it pains me and makes me hate these people. It makes me think about the movie Idiocracy.
So, I have to bite my tongue for a little while longer. Until I either go back to school full time or until I get to movie making. The way I see it is, the only way out is to remove myself from the situation. My job is a customer service job. I know what this entails. But I also know a way out and I’m running at it.

Last night, beginning my third week in Capoeira, I went into the Roda for the first time. Having hurt my shoulder/arm a little last Friday, I was rested and ready to get in there. I like the idea that Capoeira practice is where you learn new moves and techniques but the Roda is where the real learning happens. Where you apply everything you’ve been taught in a fun but realistic way. Challenging you to explore the moves and dance with your partner. I’m looking forward to… getting more comfortable with the moves. Being able to concentrate on my sparing partner as opposed to what I’m doing. Building my muscle memory so that everything I do flows with reason and purpose rather than clumsily throwing a kick or dodging a bit too late.
I plan to begin practicing… moves in a series on my own time. Probably in sets of twenty or so. I figure repetition is how you get good at something. I currently favor my right side and have a lot of difficulty… with my left. I wish to be equally strong on both sides. This will take a lot of work. I had issues with this as a skateboarder when I’d want to switch stance. I could never really get used to it. I eventually learned how to ride and ollie in switch, but could never get beyond that. Aside from being relatively inflexible in general, allowing myself to loosen up to do left sided kicks or figure out a move on the left side is a challenge I need to push myself to overcome. This is how I’m beginning to view life in general though, a series of challenges one has to overcome. Overcoming ones self might possibly be one of the most challenging things however. Luckily I’m getting used to pain again. That will come in handy down the road when I actually get struck in the Roda.
I am starting to loosen up all over after only a couple weeks. My body has a tendency to seize up when I’m inactive. Especially since I do a lot of computer related stuff. Hunching over the computer causes my back to hurt as well as a build up of acids in my chest area. When I’m regularly active the acids seem to break down making me feel a lot looser. I’ve been considering going to Rolphing sessions. Unfortunately, to my understanding, the treatments go over the course of ten sessions costing around $100 a session. So, it’s not very cheap. The possible benefits are that I could gain a large amount of flexibility all over my body and have my alignment straightened, which might give me a little extra height. I believe these… treatments also help to purge the body of toxins buried in deep muscle tissue. All of these things sound good to me. Before I can go forward with this however, I need to get some bills paid down and probably get my dentist procedures out of the way. I’m looking at around $3000 – $4000 before I can even consider starting Rolphing sessions. So, until then, I work Whiffies and as many video jobs as I can get. If I’m lucky, come the beginning of next year I can get in for sessions and be closer to my goal of being down to one major bill to pay per month.

I’ve been slowly going through my boxes of shit at home. After Kim and I moved I decided that it was most definitely time to get rid stuff that I’ve been carting around with me for years… I have a bunch of old software which I’ve already upgraded and have no use for anymore. I have a box filled with old notebooks, journals and random scraps of paper. Also, I have a box filled various media: DV tapes, cassette tapes, old computer disks, DVD’s and CD’s. I have no use for this clutter. The last couple nights I’ve been going through the media box. Figuring out what’s on the random disks, ripping to my hard drive and or tossing. It takes a while to go through all of this stuff, but I need to do it so I can move on. There are so many things from almost, up to, 10 years that I’d pretty much forgotten about. Things that were fun at one point and are now pretty much pointless reminders. Once I get through the media box I get to go through the notebooks, journals and whatnot. I’m not looking forward to this. Almost to the point where I’m thinking about skipping the look through and simply throwing it all in the recycling bin.
I’ve also been updating my YouTube page. Getting all my old stuff up as well as things I chose not to post. Everyone has things that they’re not too proud of, I’ve got a few videos like that. But, I’m going to share them anyway.
In the next couple weeks I should be getting a bit of confirmation on my schedule. At the immediate, I’m working a split weekend schedule and covering a shift that is currently uncovered on the calendar. This means I’m working more hours, which is good. However, my life is sort of on hold until I’m able to get a regular set schedule again. As a new person will be hired on, my hopes are that I will fall into a 4 day a week regular routine. Giving me weekends off. If this comes to pass, I can: return to Sunday writing sessions with my friends, have an actual weekend and hopefully feel a bit less tired. In the meantime, dusting the cobwebs of my life seems like a good idea. Cleaning house, getting ready to jump forward. That is my current plan. This all feels right to me at the moment. I like it when things feel right.

Wow, only one interruption. This might be a slow, slow day here at the carts.

I don’t have a name for my new religion, at least not yet. Maybe I can get some suggestions. For now I will call it Awesomanity. If there were a church for it, it would be the church of Awesome. So, if people ask, I can say I’m an Awesome. Or simply… I’m Awesome.

After thinking about this I realized that there is no way in this vast universe that I’m the first person to have thought of this. So, I did some research. Below is what I’ve found.

These are not what I mean: this or this or this.
This is way more what I mean… this or this.

These are my commandments. Currently in no particular order:

1. Be awesome! – This means to be a super rad human being. To take care of yourself. Treat yourself well and due the same to everybody else. It’s the do unto others thing. Except, Do the thing that you’d do unto others to yourself equally. Don’t blow smoke up your own ass and think that you are the ultimate gift to this world, but rather understand your place and how you can make things better for yourself and others around you. I always keep in mind the simple statement of Bill and Ted, “Be excellent to each other and party on dudes.” Being excellent to each other shouldn’t be hard. Partying should be regarded as enjoying life.

2. Your body is your temple. Treat it that way! – A carbon based multicellular organism such as us, humans, is the most amazingly sophisticated machine created. We are built to do pretty much anything we can imagine doing and if we can’t physically do it, we can imagine and manufacture a way to help us to do it. Unfortunately most of us treat our body like shit! We eat awful foods. We don’t exercise. We are universally lazy and ungrateful of what we have. I say, get off your ass and go for a walk. Take the stairs when possible and get your body thanking you. If you have the means, join a gym or program with workout sessions. Take a martial arts class. Find a way to have somebody push you to do what you wont normally do on your own and go regularly. Start eating better. Get more fresh fruits and vegetables into your diet. Try and eat a balanced enough diet that you don’t have to take supplements. You will feel really good once you do this regularly. Become habitual about it and the idea of working out will feel like a positive things rather than a punishment.

3. Get things done! – If you have a project in the works. Put all your energy into it. Get it finished. If you have ideas, execute them as rapidly as possible. Try not to talk much about them without doing any work on them (even if your excited about it). Presenting a finished product to people is far more satisfying then telling them about the idea. Remember, genius is finishing.

4. Don’t judge! – Just don’t be that person. Judging somebody based on their appearance is usually a bad idea. Even if your initial assumption of that person is correct. If you learn to be awesome to others and think positively regardless of the situation the automation of learned judgments can begin to fade into a vast obscurity.

5. Treat yourself! – Almost everyone who is already awesome will tell you to treat yourself here and there. If you get too rigid along your path to personal righteousness and deny yourself personal indulgences here and there, you wont like it. Life has to many yummy and fun things to deny yourself any of it. We as a culture have become over indulgent though. We fancy a treat after we’ve worked a long day. After we’ve gone for a jog. After we’ve finished our homework. It seems that every time we accomplish an insignificant goal or overcome a challenge we must reward ourselves. Don’t do this. Go out of your way for a week. Eat right, exercise, work on your projects and do it with a mad passion. At the end of that week, if you feel accomplished in what you’ve done, gift yourself something small. Whether it be an activity or a treat, doesn’t matter just don’t dwell on how rad it is. Accept it for what it is in that moment and then resume to being awesome. Keep in mind that you can be awesome while indulging but over indulgence is not awesome.

6. Don’t be pushy! – Being awesome is something that one simply does on ones own terms. Pushing awesomeness on others is not awesome. If others ask why you’re so awesome or how you became so awesome, feel free to explain as to help them out on their on path to awesomeness. But, do not try and force others to be awesome simply because you think they should try to be so. It’s just not cool. Sure, having other awesome people roaming the earth would be a great thing but if they know they’re awesome and they boast that they’re awesome then they’re probably not quite as awesome as they think they are.

This is a rough draft and will be edited. As I read it and rewrite and overall figure out if what I’m trying to get across works or not. Once I have this all solidified to a point which I like it I will move on, let it be what it is and live my a life according to it.